Jake Says:

During a family "meeting" in the hall bathroom, today... the open window and a gust of wind blew down a big frame, making a big noise, and scraping the crap outta the wall.

Jake: What did you do, Mommy?
Me: Nothing.
Jake: Who did that, then?
Me: No one did it. It was the wind, pal. It was just an accident.
Jake: I'm sorry the wind broke your New York picture, Mommy.
Me: Thanks.
Jake: Maybe you should spank the wind.
Me: I wish I could, buddy.