Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Mishaps

When I was three years old, my dad wandered outside to find out what the loud, metal-crushing sound was that he was hearing from inside the house.
He found me, his firstborn, using the roof of his brand new car as a trampoline.
I don't remember getting up on the car (I was three years old), or which friend coerced me into the jumping performance for all the neighborhood kids... but I can still remember the way my dad's voice sounded when he said my name and asked me what I was doing. I remember the way my blood ran cold and the fear I felt in knowing that I was in Really. Big. Trouble.
Over the years, I've often wondered at how my dad didn't straight-up kill me right then and there. But tonight--when I found Jake hitting and smashing his pine-cone against my brand new kitchen table, I saw red.
So, I'm sorry Dad. Really... and I mean it this time.

*I have been debating if the crack in the table top's seam and dent in the leg (straight out the box!) warranted a return. I think that now--yes it does. 

11 comments:

Becca Jo said...

are you going to say that the pine-cone indents were there too? ;) haha! Having kids makes you wonder why even try having nice things.

Jen Carter said...

oh no....

Jessie said...

So funny!

Crew took a garden shovel and whacked it against my coffee table, and I wanted to take that shovel and whack Crew with it. Ha. Don't worry, I didn't do it.

Markelle said...

really he just did you a favor by tipping the scale and forcing you to take back the table...you have no choice now. tell that to Blaine:)

Shum Girl said...

Yes it does!

Karin said...

Yikes! Guess he likes the antiqued look? Way to keep your cool.
Joseph took a donkey from a manger scene and banged up my mom's great-grandmother's coffee table over Christmas. I'm still trying to figure out how to fix that one, so let me know what you do;)

Karin said...

P.S. I love that you were able to relate this to your own personal experience. But does this mean my 3 year old will remember things? I've been hoping I have another year or two before those type of memories begin to stick...;)

Scott and Megan said...

oh this had me laughing!!! Oh man, i can imagine the sound of your dad's voice!!! I was afraid of him just reading the story! For the record, that crack in said NEW table, was REALLY bad anyway! I was gonna say something but didnt wanna make a big deal (does that make you feel better? j/k)I like the "rough" look. Plus look at that picture below of him holding his precious pinecone...oh man that is adorable!

Laurel said...

Did you break the pine cone into tiny pieces and throw it in the trash right in front of him? Because that's the "mature" reaction I probably would have regressed to in order to keep from killing my child.

Ohhhhh, the treats we're all in for...

LEE BIEN said...

The neighbor girl's name was Sheri Someone and let's blame it all on her. We forgave you a long time ago!

Kendee said...

Your dad is a good man. Sorry, I hate that.